In what might be the most delightfully bizarre wellness news of the year, East Hampton’s most famous (and possibly only) clown massage collective is celebrating Juneteenth with a special offer designed to liberate more than just your funny bone. Get ready to have your muscles kneaded and your spirits tickled.
Freedom Through Foolery
East Hampton Clown Massage (EHCM), an outfit that has somehow been voted the “#1 Clown Massage on the East End” for three years running, is offering a 25% discount all month long to commemorate Juneteenth. Their mission? To use the art of clowning to achieve a different kind of freedom.
Joeky, the founder and CEO of the troupe, explains the philosophy with a twinkle in his eye and a giggle in his voice:
“We want to emancipate tension in your body, mind and soul as we remain mindful of the stain on the collective American conscience that was the institution of slavery. The only bondage we should ever tolerate is the kind I like in the bedroom.”
The promotion, cheekily accessed with the discount code “FREE TO HE-HE,” is already causing a stir. According to a press release from ASN Hub, the demand for these “Certified Clown Masseuses (CCMs)” is so high that they’re fully booked through August. However, the discount will be honored for any future appointments made this month, so if you’ve ever dreamed of having your knots worked out by a professional merrymaker, now’s your chance to get on the waitlist.
An Industry Craving the Unconventional
While the idea of a “clown massage” might sound like a fever dream, it taps directly into the modern wellness industry’s hunger for unique, creator-led experiences. In an era where consumers are tired of bland, cookie-cutter spa days, concepts that blend therapy with performance art are finding a surprisingly receptive audience. EHCM seems to have perfected this blend, creating a niche that’s both absurd and alluring.
The collective even launched a new website back in April to handle the influx of online bookings, a sign that this quirky business is serious about its silliness. While the special discount doesn’t apply to their online shop, fans can still grab branded trucker caps, sweatshirts, and tote bags to show their support.
What’s Next? Get Ready to He-He
For now, the future for East Hampton Clown Massage looks bright, painted in bold, primary colors. They’ve cornered a market no one knew existed and are leaning into their unique brand of therapeutic humor with gusto.
As the wellness world continues to evolve, experiences that prioritize joy and genuine connection—even in the most unexpected forms—are leading the charge. And as founder Joeky’s memorable sign-off reminds us, sometimes the most profound release comes from not taking things too seriously.
* Photo from asnhub.com
